What was the one experience that completely changed your life? What happened? How did it change your life?
I forgive myself a little more each got for accepting I was born perfect, it’s not those around me to decided note take the burden of good over evil….
Today’s therapy session I was in turmoil with…on my I hadn’t competed my list of obligations I said I would do..WHY NOT, YOU THINK? That’s why I’m in therapy, I know why the “F”, I don’t complete the things that would make a beneficial positive changes in my life?
I do EMDR, TAP THERAPY, and TALK, love my therapist, very connected spirit and my recovery to make through the walls I’ve built, I’m disabled now and NEED HELP, lots of it!
So as I recalled at today’s session, I desperately wanted to cancel because of my lack of obligation and lack of motion on that white board list. Then today she said, “guess what you get to LOVE and RE LIVE that inner child in you. ” My GOD, I’VE BEEN HEARD…affirming it’s time for me to focus on me, only me, be that child and allow yourself to be fed.
Food for thought, if we allow ourselves to be selfish, goes that scare those we love?
Ever think of how a tripod works perfectly when level and stands strong? Well I call my 2 best friends whom I met at UCD on Tower 5 for traumatic brain and spinal cord injuries. This was back in April, when I was in intensive care for Cauda Equina, my second spinal cord surgery and was learning to walk again. As I’m naturally a optimistic individual, Tower 5 is anything that resembles the beauty of a sunny day. However, I myself have two wonderful men I met there who have become my Tripod. They show up at my PT/weekly, unload my wheelchair, we laugh at the exercises as some are rather sexual…but they there to lend me a hand of support. I call us the “Tripod” because when they were discharged weeks before me I was sad, felt alone but they kept coming back to visit and spend time in the place they least favored “the hospital”. The mysterious thing about the way God works is that he already set the foundation of our pact, the “Tripod” before they and I received the news that both are terminal. All I can bank on is that Gods purpose is bigger than mine and as we travel are journeys together, we need one another. Together we travel over to oncology for R’s radiation, then to neurology to S’s injections. The process for us comes naturally, we then spoil ourselves to lunch where we request butter for R, and lots of raw sugar for S and my ice tea. The moments we spend are now seen by the staff at UCD, how many of us really come out of such a place with angles who change our lives. What I am coming to realize we have a profound unique relationship, all which at one point will dissolve but the present is all we live for. It reminds me that although I’m fighting for my survival, homeless twice, I’m not terminal. Second is that before my surgeries I owned a caregiving company and worked in Hospice care. So I’m aware of the path my Tripod is on…however it’s my life’s goal to keep them alive in future present moments and teach others through our story how profound PURPOSE is. Truly, I don’t know the plan but I’m Game to take the ride. One thing I can say is my life is rich because they are in it. Each hug, smile, “I LOVE YOU”, means so much. Come along as I share the road less traveled.